There's a wealth of skin treatments, beauty treatments, and skincare options out there – duh, right? You can find a treatment for every imaginable type of skin problem, not mention treatments for skin issues you never even imagined. In the quest for softer, smoother, younger-looking skin, the skin care world has amassed an ever growing collection of lotions, potions, serums, and creams designed to target dry, oily, acne-prone, uneven, and wrinkled skin. When they don't work, intrepid minds strive to come up with skin treatments that get the job done. It's just … that leads to some pretty extreme skin care treatments and beauty techniques.
Yeah. This exists. It involves applying an ewe's placenta to your face. Why? Well, apparently it not only reduces the signs of aging but reverses them. Victoria Beckham has tried it. Would you?
From everything I've read, seen, and heard, this actually works, so it's becoming much more widespread. My feet suffer greatly throughout the winter and look monstrous come spring, but I don't know if I could handle this. I mean, minnows used to nibble on my toes in Summersville Lake when I was a kid, but … my feet are awfully ticklish.
At the very least, this is the prettiest facial you could ever get. It's pretty pricey, too, but for the cost of a gold mask, you get hydrated, lifted, moisturized, and firmed skin, with far fewer wrinkles and fine lines.
This treatment is popular at spas in Thailand. The snails ooze over your fast, taking little snail journeys. The mucus is the beneficial part, the claim being that it smooths your wrinkles and even slows down the rate at which your skin ages. Hell, pick out a few garden snails for free and let them crawl all over you.
I mean. They always say it's good for your hair, skin, and nails, right? Evidently. You can get a sperm treatment in a variety of different ways. … But seriously, there are cocktails, facial applications, hair treatments, or you could … I don't know, do it the, um, the old-fashioned way, I guess. K bye. (There's actually a pretty great hair treatment that uses bull semen, though.)
This isn't a bad idea, really. Beer is full of anti-inflammatory agents, after all.
Or you can try this – those anti-inflammatory properties keep giving. They make beer the perfect choice for skin care, especially if mixed with other beneficial ingredients, such as vinegar, avocado, and honey. This simple treatment can springboard cell regeneration and soothe dry skin.
Leeches are beneficial in ever so many ways, but I just … I just can't. Can you? Because I cannot.
I know cupping is good for circulation and stress, but that's a big ol' cup of nope for me, thanks.
I don't know if I could hang with this facial. The esthetician soaks a towel in alcohol, puts it on your face, and then LIGHTS IT ON FIRE. She or he then has to yank it off before it burns off your entire face, obvs. Supposedly it can fight colds, jump start weight loss, and make your skin look fresh and glowing. I wonder if that has anything to do with the FIRE.
This is a legit treatment, allegedly used by the Geisha of a bygone era – hence why the NYC spa claiming to have invented it refers to it as the Geisha facial. A little problematic, but okay, since apparently bird droppings really do bright your skin while promoting healing.
Yes. A “bath” in hay. You can find the treatment at different spas in Italy. There are dry baths, which also use a variety of herbs, and wet baths – aka hay soaks – which consist of hay flowers and St. John's wort. The claim? That they'll relax you and boost your immune system.
This is a California creation, a treatment that allows you to bathe in sound. Just sound. Actually, they're “sonic healing sessions,” and they also claim to relax you and improve your immune system.
So this. Yeah. And they're popular, as a matter of fact, due to their ability to clear up acne, psoriasis, and eczema.
Ow. No. Never. No.
Don't worry, they're non-venomous. This treatment is popular in Israel. Its purpose is to relax you. That would not relax me.
If you have acne prone skin, this is an idea for you – spots like Mud in Chicago claim that the lauric acid in breast milk can soothe acne, so they use it in their facials.
I'd try a couple of these, but others are … well. Wow. What do you think?
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